Becoming a surrogate mother is a selfless choice made by many
courageous women every year. Countless surrogates describe the experience as a
truly fulfilling journey, and an essential piece of that journey is having a
reliable support system in place. From unpredictable emotions to medical
attention and perhaps some anxiety or uncertainty along the way, a surrogate
mother’s support system can be there to help through every laugh and tear.

Most surrogate mothers find support in their closest family
members: spouses, parents, siblings, and cousins. If you are currently a
surrogate mother or you’re considering surrogacy, it’s vital that you and your
most valued family members embark on the adventure of surrogacy together.
Knowing you have a reliable, steady support system in place will help make your
process much smoother.

Start with Honesty

Once you decide to become a surrogate mother, let your closest
family members know in a way that speaks from the heart. Explain the reasons
that you feel the call to surrogacy so that your family understands the
purposes behind your choice. It’s vital that everyone is on board for this,
because you will want and need each person’s support throughout the surrogacy
process.

If you have children, be sure to teach them that this baby will
take a long time to arrive, but he or she will not be a brother or sister.
Share the surrogacy in a way that can make sense to a child; as long as you
don’t make it an uncomfortable topic, your children won’t consider the
surrogacy as anything other than natural and exciting.

Learn Together

There’s a great deal to learn when it comes to surrogacy. Take
time to sit with your partner and other close family members to sort through
the literature that helps all of you understand what the next year of your life
will look like. From being matched with a family and receiving the embryo
transfer to obstetrician appointments and ultimately the birth, you’re in for a
wild ride. The more your family learns about the surrogacy process, the better
they will know what to expect and how to effectively support you.

Emotional Support

Pregnancy is a time of unpredictable hormones, body changes, and
extra sources of stress to begin with, but these emotional ups and downs have
the potential to become more complicated during a surrogate pregnancy, since a
hopeful couple is relying on you to deliver their healthy and nourished baby. Your
family can provide a major sense of support by understanding your emotions,
listening to you through every situation, and appreciating the significance of
your surrogacy experience.

But your family’s support doesn’t end when the baby is born. There will be a period of transition after the joy of
helping another couple start a family as you begin to work to get your
household and your lives back to normal. The best
thing you can do for yourself at any point is to communicate your needs,
wishes, and thoughts so your family can help you to the very best of its abilities!  

Physical Support

Pregnancy does, of course, require physical support from your
loved ones. Transportation to appointments and meetings, daily tasks at home
that become harder as your trimesters progress, and the baby’s delivery will
all prove much easier with your family members there to assist.

The smoothest road to physical support begins with communication
at the commencement of your surrogacy. Establish which family members will be
able to help with each expected task. Perhaps your partner will support you in
daily tasks at home and your sister will accompany you to all of your
appointments. Each family will find the rhythm that works best, but you
definitely need to know you can count on your family members for this support.

It’s said that it takes a village to raise a child, but it takes
a village to bring a child into this world as well.  The success of your surrogacy will be in large
part thanks to the incredible family members that were always there to help you
through every step of the journey.